Raging Douchebag Week Begins Months Early
Posted on
Thursday, January 18, 2007
by Gary A. Ballard
There are some stories to which the only acceptable response is a profanity-laden tirade of outrage, angst and venom. This is one such story.
Alberto Gonzales, the US Attorney General, has made a speech to the American Enterprise Institute that boils down to a rebuke of the American Justice System for not rolling over like a whipped dog. For those unaware who the American Enterprise Institute is, they are a grousing bunch of neo-con douchebags with fingers in all the dirty pies. They love the idea of a new surge of dead bodies in Iraq. They think big conglomerate stores like Wal-Mart benefit consumers instead of removing options, lowering the average wage and shafting employees on the right to unions and good healthcare. But on to Gonzales, who really needs a good smack in the mouth for saying vile shit like this.
To those words, I can only respond, "FUCK YOU, YOU RAGING DOUCHEBAG."
Maybe he's right. Maybe a judge, fully versed in the laws of the land, can't decide what is in the national security interests. But what you really mean to say is that those damn pesky judges keep getting in the way of you and your band of criminals doing anything you damn well please, because they keep quoting the fucking laws back to you. Those damn judges keep showing your ignorant ass that no, really, you can't just fucking lock up anyone you name an enemy combatant forever without proper representation, access to the evidence used against them or knowledge of what they've supposedly done to be treated like a Kafka-esque fuckpuppet.
See, in cases where the government is trying to do whatever it pleases, the government and those working for it whether an appointed or an elected official has to follow the laws. Yes, Al, you have to follow the law even if it means your investigation isn't as efficient, or it means you have to let someone you think is a terrorist go because you can't get good enough admissible evidence against them. You can't just listen in to any phone conversation you wish without bothering to justify the need to listen to a court. These things are what we rational plebians call the goddam law, and you and your cowboy chimp president are not above it.
It is you, sir, who are unfit to serve the people of this country as Attorney General, just as your crooning predecessor was unfit to serve. And as far as stretching the law to fit policy preferences go, you are the fucking kung-fu master when it comes to that skill.
So I give you a hearty FUCK YOU, YOU RAGING DOUCHEBAG. May rabid badgers gnaw your nubblies where it's obvious your brains are stored.
Thundercunt.
Alberto Gonzales, the US Attorney General, has made a speech to the American Enterprise Institute that boils down to a rebuke of the American Justice System for not rolling over like a whipped dog. For those unaware who the American Enterprise Institute is, they are a grousing bunch of neo-con douchebags with fingers in all the dirty pies. They love the idea of a new surge of dead bodies in Iraq. They think big conglomerate stores like Wal-Mart benefit consumers instead of removing options, lowering the average wage and shafting employees on the right to unions and good healthcare. But on to Gonzales, who really needs a good smack in the mouth for saying vile shit like this.
In remarks prepared for delivery Wednesday, Gonzales says judges generally
should defer to the will of the president and Congress when deciding national
security cases. He also raps jurists who "apply an activist philosophy that
stretches the law to suit policy preferences."
The text of the speech, scheduled for the American Enterprise Institute,
was obtained Tuesday by The Associated Press. It outlines, in part, what
qualities the Bush administration looks for when selecting candidates for the
federal bench.
"We want to determine whether he understands the inherent limits that
make an unelected judiciary inferior to Congress or the president in making
policy judgments," Gonzales says in the prepared speech. "That, for example, a
judge will never be in the best position to know what is in the national
security interests of our country."
To those words, I can only respond, "FUCK YOU, YOU RAGING DOUCHEBAG."
Maybe he's right. Maybe a judge, fully versed in the laws of the land, can't decide what is in the national security interests. But what you really mean to say is that those damn pesky judges keep getting in the way of you and your band of criminals doing anything you damn well please, because they keep quoting the fucking laws back to you. Those damn judges keep showing your ignorant ass that no, really, you can't just fucking lock up anyone you name an enemy combatant forever without proper representation, access to the evidence used against them or knowledge of what they've supposedly done to be treated like a Kafka-esque fuckpuppet.
See, in cases where the government is trying to do whatever it pleases, the government and those working for it whether an appointed or an elected official has to follow the laws. Yes, Al, you have to follow the law even if it means your investigation isn't as efficient, or it means you have to let someone you think is a terrorist go because you can't get good enough admissible evidence against them. You can't just listen in to any phone conversation you wish without bothering to justify the need to listen to a court. These things are what we rational plebians call the goddam law, and you and your cowboy chimp president are not above it.
It is you, sir, who are unfit to serve the people of this country as Attorney General, just as your crooning predecessor was unfit to serve. And as far as stretching the law to fit policy preferences go, you are the fucking kung-fu master when it comes to that skill.
So I give you a hearty FUCK YOU, YOU RAGING DOUCHEBAG. May rabid badgers gnaw your nubblies where it's obvious your brains are stored.
Thundercunt.
Labels: Bush Administration, Politics, Raging Douchebag Week
posted by Gary A. Ballard @ 3:32 PM
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